We only had 50 name tags

We ran out of name tags...we ran out of wine glasses and wine. The spinach dip was gone and so was the shrimp cocktail. If you were driving around Bernardsville and Basking Ridge, NJ this week you would say to yourself "Where the hell is everyone going?" Well I will tell you- we are going to end of the year soccer games, lacrosse games, dance recitals, piano, chorus and orchestra concerts, class parties, Girl Scout ceremonies, Cub Scout meetings and Indian Princess celebrations. And a few other things I am forgetting. But tonight at 8:00 there were 73 women sitting on a lawn in New Jersey signing cards for:
John- a soldier who had his legs blown off in Afganistan within the first three weeks of being there (we are sending him and his mom money from our garage sale)
Carly- a 20 something year old who works at an exercise studio in town and her apartment burned down a few months ago (we are giving her a gift card to buy things for her new apartment)
Helen- a mother of 4 kids in Sloan Kettering for 6 weeks receiving treatments (we are sending her a necklace that says "just breathe" and a book to read in the hospital)
Kelly- Who's husband died unexpectedly last month at the Kentucky Derby and has 3 children (we are sending them a box filled with 100 dollar bills to use for lunch money and errands)
and 8 other families that are struggling with an unexpected situation.

I am overwhelmed (or whelmed if you have read my past blog on this subject) with my life. That Eddie is sleeping upstairs and when I left the house, tonight at 6:00, a total disaster with mac and cheese on the stove he said what he always says " Have a great meeting, you're awesome and I love you" I am "whelmed" with the fact that 73 women left there houses tonight to come and do what started out as a thought in my head, at one of the lowest points in my life... a group for women to come together and get real and give to others...(crazy, I told myself at the time...nothing but crazy) But I did it and tonight, 7 years later, we were at my little sister's house and her kids sat through the meeting. When we finished they asked if they too, could light prayer candles...one for Uncle John who was killed on 9/11 and one for Grampy who died 4 short years later, and we looked down and there where 2 unlit candles.

That Maggie Doyne was there, home from running her orphange in Nepal and Katie Meyeler was there, taking a break from running her More Than Me Foundation in Liberia, and a newcomer...Shannon, who is still in high school but has started her own group to support kids in Tanzania- where the hell is Tanzania???

This is how AWESOME Heartworks is- these young women are doing all the things I didnt do because I found my Eddie and always wanted to get married and have kids. It is not that I am envious of them...but more that I am profoundly grateful for the work they are doing in the world while I am living in New Jersey driving to soccer practice. And I am also grateful for my friend Ann Stone's son Ben who left last week for the Peace Corp. I am grateful because I have "the calling" and I get to do my calling with AWESOME women and be married to my Eddie and sleep in a comfortable bed every night and wake up to my girls every morning. I get to make their lunches and hear their babble in the back seat of my mini van (yes, my cool days are way over) and I get to drink wine the first Tuesday of every month with women dedicated to a picture bigger than driving around our little town with Diet Coke in hand and Ray Bands blocking the sun. I will see my little Charlie this Friday on my way up to my 20th college reunion and I will give him the card that the Heartworks women signed tonight. I realize that I am someone whose life dreams have come true and I pray to God that I remember this feeling when I am driving around tomorrow like a mad woman,  late for soocer, spilling my Diet Coke all over my yoga pants (even though I'm not going to yoga) and realizing that I forgot to send in the juice boxes for the class party.